Thirty Snowflakes

Well, let's check in on the list, now shall we? Although my devotion to the list had gone into hibernation, now that I look at it again, I am pleased to find that I am accomplished several more goals.

Learn the rest of "Good King Wenceslas"

I can't really explain my fascination with this song (perhaps just an offshoot of my affinity for All Things Old), but I have known just the first three verses of it since sixth grade, when the chorus teacher Mrs. Bawel made us sing it as a warmup. Then, I went to visit my sister, and lo and behold, she knew ALL FIVE VERSES! And frequently sang them to her daughter as a lullaby! I immediately vowed to learn the rest of the song so that I could do the same, either to my niece or, less likely, for my own daughter.

And now, I CAN! How's that for a life goal.

Knit a scarf.

I started the scarf about a year ago, not long after Cadence taught us how to knit and I plowed right through three dishcloths. It took a hiatus over the summer, when the house was so hot I couldn't bear to even touch that warm merino, but now I am happy to say it is completed and in use as a regular part of my wardrobe.

Win a third NaNoWriMo.

Well, I won again. Whoopee. Yes, this year's victory just felt hollow. A non-accomplishment. Last year, at the close of November, I felt inspired. I felt that I had successfully built relationships with new friends, and I was pleased with my novel. I think I wrote about how pleased I was right here, something about having reawakened something that was dead, or... something equally melodramatic.

And this year, the whole month just felt like a chore. Every time I sat down to write, I felt as though I could be putting my time to better use. I went to almost no write-ins, versus last year's pace of about 1-2 a week. This year's effort was a solitary endeavor, and while that is my natural state, it turns out it's not nearly so enjoyable or fulfilling that way. Last year I won with a group of friends around and it felt so beautifully celebratory; this year I was totally alone, hit 50k, verified, shrugged, and moved on with life.

At this point I couldn't say whether I'll be participating in NaNo again or not.

Go to the Minnesota State Fair

Oh wow, I've deserted the list for even longer than I thought. Dan and I were lucky enough to make it to the fair, thanks to Nelle who passed along her free tickets! We had a blast.

Go to Florida

Managed to squeeze this in rather earlier than I expected! I flew out on Christmas Day and came back on New Year's Eve. Had a wonderful time visiting with my family and soaking up the warm weather, and flew back into something like 8 degrees (which, frankly, after the winter we've been through since then, doesn't feel all that horrible anymore. at least it's positive). I spent New Year's Eve begrudgingly staying awake until midnight just on principle, as Dan worked from home, and went to bed at 12:01. (Again a striking change from last year, where I.. well, better not to say, but it is certain I am regressing socially.)

Well, that's it for the list, for now. What else. Let's see. Work is good, except for the conviction that they all are about to imminently discover how much I secretly suck and rue the day they hired me, and I am trying to come to terms with the fact that I'll never do much of anything useful with my life. I might be a touch depressed. Perhaps it's only seasonal. These months of frozen wasteland do take their toll, now don't they, though they are easy enough to brush off while you are not actively experiencing them. I've had many, many moments (mostly at bus stops) where I can't even fathom why we voluntarily decided to put ourselves through this. But nothing lasts forever, not even a Minnesota deathwinter.

I turned thirty-one! Thirty-one might have been more fun than twenty-one! So that's a good sign for the future.

So because I don't have enough arbitrary internet projects going, I signed up at www.365project.org on a whim. The premise is very simple. No set theme, just take a photo a day, every day, for the next year. My photography skills are mediocre at best, but I figured, what better way to learn, and document my year in the process?

Then I went back and forth, back and forth about whether I actually wanted to posted my pictures or share them anywhere. I'm not a photographer, my inner voice whined, my pictures are stupid, nobody wants to see them...

Fuck it! It's all true, but you're going to see them anyway!

I'm tired of hiding without knowing what I'm hiding from.